I am just a jumble

I am just a jumble
a mess of thought
in thought
in wrought
of what has befallen me
in times of disgrace I have unleashed my soul
so as to unwatch my behavior
devoid of self respect
I clung to the disclaimer of human
I flung and tossed about conject
aimed at me as it was a skipping stone upon the sea of neglect
disheartened I sat down
at the waves rippling
effect on the air about me
to gentle for words
I began to breathe again
I breathed as though I had no lungs
no voice to project my terror
that I was still alive
in a body meant to harness stronger men
my flesh grew weak through lack of judgement
and my thought deteriorated so slowly that my skin crawled with weeping
sores from above my head
hung the halo I had discarded eons ago
and never wore again